thoughts for this year

I don't do resolutions. My reason is this: I don't like to fail. So, with that in mind, some thoughts for this year... things I might like to try, might like to do more, or might want to hope for.

write more. 

The husband thinks i should be published this year. I think that it would be nice to be published again, but I also think writing specifically to an audience, on a smart topic, with the hope of being published is a lot of effort for this mom of three - without an actual guarantee of publication. Sounds silly, I know. So for now, I might like to try writing more.

cry and/or worry less.

These things go together. I worry and cry, cry and worry. Or just get sad for no damn good reason. Which leads me to...

swear more.

:)

homemake a little.

Maybe I'll try cooking more. Or maybe I'll try picking up after kids during the day instead of leaving it till after bedtime and then stay up till the wee hours cleaning and then be exhausted the next day... and then the whole crazy cycle repeats itself. Or maybe I'll help the kids with a routine. Or maybe give myself a routine. Maybe I'll find time to scrapbook, or decorate, or paint a small wall. I'm not sure what this will entail yet. But I'd like to try settling in here a little before we move on again.

continue drinking coffee.

This has been something I've discovered that makes me happy, allows me to indulge a little bit, gives me an excuse to go out and meet a friend. It's also where I sometimes end up writing. Or reading. Or praying. So yeah, I plan on continuing this little habit. 

stay healthy.

I made some changes in my life towards the end of the year... eating better, getting out more, being active, that kind of thing. I hope to continue doing it, and I hope to try some new things that will further enable a healthy lifestyle. 

be positive.

Because I'm usually not. And being usually not positive is usually not helpful.

love people more and better.

I want people to feel loved and valuable when they're with me. I want to find ways to serve them, to deepen friendships (or start friendships), to bring smiles and relief. And I want this to flow out of...

loving Jesus more and better.

I started a reading plan on the "essential Jesus". I'm only one day in, so who knows what day 2 or 3 or 194 will bring. But I wanted to read it and dwell on it and fill my brain and heart with it to grow a better love for Jesus. I feel like years 2008-2010 showed me more who He is and allowed me to know Him, rely on Him, and believe in Him in better ways. This year is the love year.

pray.

I like to pray and I hope to do it more this year. I would like to make it a priority. And I would like to include my children more in it. They pray and they do it grandly, but I want to exhibit a prayerful life for them.

move far, far away.

Not that I want to leave all the people here I know and love, but Ireland is our new old home. And I miss it, husband misses it, and children miss it. And we can't wait to go back. This year... sometime, somehow... we return to Ireland. I want to be ready, refreshed, renewed, and raring to go.

follow through.

I don't want to fail at my good intentions anymore. I have birthday cards left unstamped, receipts from last minute trips to target for last minute gifts. I have big plans, and then forget them or ignore them. I'd like to think big this year, and follow through on it. 

belittle less, value more.

Brutal confession coming: sometimes I put myself down, or look at my life and think "what if." I don't wish any of it away and wouldn't change all that much really, but I see that sometimes, when we look at the "what ifs" or the "shoulda woulda couldas", we actually belittle what we have or what we've made or what God has given us. We belittle the gifts and the grace, when we should value them for the gifts and the graces they actually are. Going or not going to grad school = not really a big deal. Going or not going to Ireland = kinda a big deal. Thriving retirement account = not really a big deal (right now). Enjoying and sharing and being thankful for the little money/possessions/things we do have = kinda a big deal. I want to see the true value, not the monetary or worldly value. I want to value what God values and give away the kinds of things He gives away. At least, I hope to do this. It's a big hope.

So I look at this list and chances are, I'll fail at some of them - or most of them - from time to time. But if I could maybe just do one of them, one time, I'll stop thinking of myself as a failure, and celebrate a success, one at a time.