Back to the Lists

31 July 2010

When I'm in transition and feeling fussy, I like to make lists. So as we prep for the next move - this time to my hometown - the Top 10 Things I'm Looking Forward To...
  1. The older kids being in school.
  2. Meeting my mom and sis downtown for lunch.
  3. Parents and siblings and nephews.
  4. River Market Farmers Market.
  5. Visiting old friends.
  6. Watching American football with my dad.
  7. Settling down for a few months.
  8. Seeing (and using) some of our very own furniture.
  9. The chili cook-off and other fun autumn activities.
  10. Walking the Plaza.

Flash Flood Warning

20 July 2010

It never rains like this in Ireland. Hard, loud, thundery rain. I'm just in from the sidewalk, jumping and laughing and drinking cold rain. In the middle of July, I am actually shivering. But it feels super good. And I remember that it's been a good long while since I've enjoyed something so freely, even for just a few seconds.

Short, sweet, joyful freedom.

Old Home

08 July 2010

"I want to go to our old home." Ella's been saying this a lot. All this time, I was thinking the transition back to the US would be harder on Jackson, but he's been here before. He seems to know the drill. But the girl was just a baby way back when. She didn't have the vocabulary (neither did we) at the time to ask where we were going or why we had left or when things would change. But now, she's all painful statements and sighs. She loves Gramma and Grampa's house, but she knows it's not really home. And she wants to know why the next home we go to won't be home either. And she really doesn't understand why we can't back to the old home, ever, even when we go back to Ireland. That old home is someone else's home now.

Everyone says home is where you are together. Home is the safe place you make for your children. As long as Matt and I are there, we're home. That's what they say. But that's not true. Family, together, safe, those are the places where we are together. But it's not home to a 3-year-old.

There are loads of awesome and amazing and totally spectacular things about the life we've chosen to live. New people, new families, adventures, fun, experiments, travel, joy, fellowship, meaning, love... literally long lists of awesome things. But in the other column, the one thing: no home.

Where we are here, is in a home, for now. Our for now home. I think she'll learn to make due.