Random thoughts on procrastination (while I procrastinate finishing a project)

14 September 2013


I am the living worst procrastinator, which is a darn shame because I am always looking for something Super Important to do and then, predictably, dropping the ball (Asher was kind enough to reenact this). Here is my cycle of shame:

  • I am constantly bemoaning my lack of purpose, 
  • so I start volunteering for things, 
  • then freaking out.
  • Then I start drinking all the coffee
  • and not sleeping.
  • Then crying.
  • Eventually buckling down,
  • locking myself in my room till the wee hours,
  • and finishing whatever big project
  • I insanely volunteered for in the first place
  • and will do so again
  • because I never learn.

Today I'm nearing the end of the latest Super Important project and I'm so excited. And anxious (I cannot confirm or deny I am, in fact, procrastinating at this very moment). In the putting-off and dragging of feet, I am becoming more aware of my limitations. And in an effort to accept them and learn from them, I am trying to say "no" more. I am praying for discernment more. I am waiting it out more. And I'm aiming to embrace the title jack of all trades, but master of none, with a dash of laziness added to the mix.

OK, maybe I'll leave that last bit off the business cards.

Can you relate at all? Is this a fake-extroverted-introvert thing? People pleasing paranoia? Is this a symptom of my lack confidence or, perhaps, over-confidence? I need answers!

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